tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
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