He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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