Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
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