Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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