I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize