My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Randomize
