The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
