I'd wear matching sweaters with you
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's an acceptable place to lick
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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