Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
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