"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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