so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
