Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize