i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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