i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I could have mohawked her pubes.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
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he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
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