Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
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