I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
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