She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
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