shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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