wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize