david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize