He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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