fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Randomize