Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
