did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize