Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize