At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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