And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
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