brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
