Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
The convent might be a nice break from real life
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
