You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Randomize