I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
