no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
