they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
