We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
