Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
My pussy is not your playground.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
