My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Are we still banned from the library?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
