My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Randomize
