Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize
