she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
I need to wash the frat house off of me
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
