That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
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Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
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There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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