I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
