There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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