i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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