Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Randomize