remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
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