Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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