dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
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