im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Help. Why am I so naked?
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