He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Randomize