I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
she pinky promised me she was 18
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
