at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Randomize
