It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
