I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
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